What Kids Need and Don't Need

A friend of mine posted Cindy Ketron's words of advice from her FaceBook page.  As I read Cindy's words,  I agreed with everything she said.  I am happy to post her words of wisdom here to help parents navigate through many of the things that weren't even around when my husband and I were raising our children....such as social media, cell phones, too many extra activities outside of school, etc.  

As a pediatric therapist for more than 30 years, I have come up with a list of what I believe kids need and don’t need. I wish I could have a do-over on a few of these.

What kids don’t need:

1. Cell phones when they’re in grade school. Over the years, I cannot tell you one good thing that can come from this.

2. Unlimited access to social media. There is very little that is healthy on social media for children and it is getting worse.

3. So many toys that they can’t even think of something to want at birthday or holiday times. Too much of anything leaves children unable to be full. They become like buckets with holes in them.

4. Televisions in their rooms. Rooms are for sleeping. Good sleep hygiene is a dying art for too many children.

5. To be able to control the emotional climate of the home. Moody kids should not be allowed to hold the whole house hostage. If a child wants to be moody, he can go to his room and be moody by himself. Everyone else need not suffer.

6. Too much indoor time. Our kids have become hermits with social media and high tech games. It is ruining their social skills. It’s also taking a toll on their physical well-being.

7. Too many activities outside of school. No wonder this generation is so anxiety-ridden. They are overloaded. If we want to teach them to take care of themselves as they age, we must teach them to do that by our example and by limiting their extracurricular activities. Scripture even recognizes the need to rest.

8. To be able to disrespect any authority. Even authority that you as a parent dislike or the child dislikes should still be respected. There will always be an authority in your child’s life even when your child is 50.

9. To always call the shots. Children who get to always choose where to eat, where to play, and what the family does end up being brats.

10. Constant approval and pats on the back. You will not always be around to do this. Children need to learn to be proud of themselves when they do something good whether anyone tells them or not.

What children do need:

I. Rest. They play hard. Their bodies need rest to grow and develop.

2. Uninterrupted family time. The most important people to a child are those under the same roof. Make family time purposeful and protected.

3. Outdoor play time where they can explore and create. All kids need free time to imagine.

4. Rules and expectations. Be clear. Be concise. And don’t be afraid to give them.

5. Consistent discipline. If a rule is broken, a child needs to know what to expect. All fear is not a bad thing. There is a fear that can represent respect.

6. Parents who love them and love each other. Security begins here.

7. For you as a parent to say “no” sometimes. Your child does not need a lollipop or a new shirt every time you go to Walmart.

8. Hugs. Physical touch affects the development of children.

9. The ability to share their feelings about anything as long as they are respectful.

10. The most precious gift that a parent can give any child is to demonstrate a personal relationship with God and consistently teach that child through your actions what having faith in God really means. In the toughest times of their lives, they will learn in large part to rely on God by the example you display for them.

Post cred: Cindy Ketron

Happy Father's Day

I woke up this morning and saw that President Russell Nelson did a Facebook post talking about fathers on this Father's Day.  As I read his words, "...imperfect, yet devoted and loving fathers who tried to do their very best", I immediately thought of my dad.  

Enjoy reading President Nelson's complete Facebook post.  

No mortal father is perfect. I am not; neither was my father, nor his father before him. The scriptures are filled with true accounts of imperfect yet devoted and loving fathers who tried to do their very best, including Adam, Moses, Abraham, and others of the finest men who ever lived.

On this Father’s Day, I look with joy at my children, grandchildren, and ever-growing number of great-grandchildren. I am a personal witness of the multigenerational impact of a father who loves his children—and who loves the mother of his children.

There are few things more tender to children than the example of their caring father. What fathers say and do lasts forever in the hearts and minds of their children. Kindness, fidelity, honesty, patience, and devotion to God, country, and family are all defining characteristics of a righteous father.

Father’s Day is joyful for most but sorrowful for some. Gratefully, each of us can communicate with our Heavenly Father in prayer. He is never absent but is ever-welcoming. Our Heavenly Father is perfectly loving, perfectly understanding, and perfectly capable of helping us rise to meet any challenge we face. On this day, may we honor Him and strive to emulate His example, doing our very best, day after day.

Happy #FathersDay

Russell M. Nelson 

FaceBook

June 20, 2021

Marion C. Nelson, Russell M. Nelson, Russell Nelson, Jr.  

Running Towards the Light

Two days ago a friend of mine posted this video on her FaceBook page.  Because the video is 17 minutes long, it took me a couple of days to find the time to watch it.  After I watched the video, I had to desire to share this video with all my friends.  .  

So.....to all of my friends out there in the world wide web:  I invite you to watch this very touching story.  Peter Johnson found the peace that I have had throughout my life as I have  followed the light that Jesus Christ gives us.  

This is what The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints' Youtube channel said about this video:  

For a young Peter Johnson, Christmases were never the same after his parents divorced. He felt a deep hole in his soul that he longed to fill.

Like Peter, all humanity longs to live in love and safety. Such a desire is basic in all of us. But finding that peace isn’t always easy. Often, we seek peace and security from the very people, who themselves, are struggling. The world is filled with many distracting and deceiving voices that claim to have the answer to the happy life. 

But, as Peter learned, when we come to hear His voice—the voice of Him who overcame the world, whose voice is pure love—then we come to discover our true identity. We gain a glimpse of our eternal self. We sense our nobility as a son or daughter of God. We have new personal power. We are no longer distracted and deceived by fake voices. We hear the one true voice that heals aching hearts and wounded souls—voice of Jesus Christ.

 

He is eager to help. He knows each of us. He awaits our invitation.

“When you’re running from the darkness, it’s a feeling of fear,” Peter said. “But when you’re running towards the light, it’s hope. You know you’re running to strength and peace and happiness. We all need to be running to the light.”

Here are a few YouTube comments from the comment section to the video. 

I love the symbolism of the scene as his younger self is on stage looking at the man he has become, Great video and message, thanks...

"When you're running from the darkness, it's a feeling of fear. But when you're running towards the light, its hope. You know you're running to strength, and peace, and happiness. We all need to be running to the light." Standing face to face with echoes of our formers selves, we can evaluate today, where am I going ... and why am I running? Loved this, thank you.

Reply to the above comment: 

That part got me. I have been trying to break away from my addiction for a few years without any success, and after Elder Johnson said this, it clicked in my mind that I have been running away from the darkness, but not running to the light. Whenever I have run towards the light, I find the safety that I want and need.

Our Visit to Arches National Park

We recently drove four hours south to Moab in southeast Utah for a walk back in time...several million years back, that is.  Our daughter, Rachel, as well as Kathleen's brother Craig, his wife, Lynn, and their son, Brian, made this an unforgettable visit to one of the most spectacular areas of the country.

We first ventured out to Dead Horse Point State Park, that boasts a vista that rivals that of the Grand  Canyon. 

Dead Horse Point overlooks the winding Colorado River far below, a geological lesson itself of erosion on solid rock occurring over millions of years. 

The next day, we entered Arches National Park, visited by thousands annually.  Of course you recognize this rock formation! Delicate Arch, an icon of Utah that appears on many of the state's license plates. Easy to get to? Not really.

Leaving the parking lot to hike to Delicate Arch, we passed the original, weathered log cabin of disabled Civil War veteran John Wesley Wolfe and his son who settled here in the late 1800's. It's evidence of the primitive ranch they operated for over 20 years. 

We continued our 50 minute hike upward for a mile and a half beyond the Wolfe cabin. The trail is rugged and over slick rock at times. We were relieved the temperature was in the 50's this time of year. In the summer it's brutal with no shade. (From left to right) Scott, Rachel, Brian, and Craig pause to catch their breath. 

Delicate Arch is one of two thousand cataloged arches of the area. 

Scott and Kathleen are dwarfed under its lofty span.

We enjoyed a brief snack before starting our descent. In the foreground, guests to the park line up to get their picture taken under Delicate Arch.

A most unique rock formation is Double Arch, on the left side of the photo. From inside it appears as a three-dimensional, open stone cavern. 

Double Arch was formed over millions of years by water seeping through large puddles formed in stone.  And here, puddles formed on top of each other...the rock giving way to the forces of nature...

...to what is left-- a heavenly-sculpted arch, seemingly out-of-this-world.  

Now, in modern times, humans scramble over the remains of rock that testifies that there is a Creator of all of this. 

Fiery Furnace Viewpoint overlooks the hundreds of mute stone monoliths that comprise Fiery Furnace, so named for their reddish hue, similar to weathered iron. 

It's a short, half mile walk to Skyline Arch.

What's interesting about this arch is that it was a much smaller opening until 1940, when with a crack, an enormous section tumbled below.  

I really enjoyed being with my brother Craig on this trip.

Here, Scott stands atop some of the boulders that came loose from Skyline Arch. He's just glad he wasn't underneath when nature decided to dislodge them!

Back to civilization and a lovely dinner in Moab at Dewey's. We were tired but in awe of what we had just seen during the day.

Our trip to this beautiful part of God's creation and of His handiwork will forever remain in our hearts. 

🌈Let's Make a Rainbow

 Have you ever wondered how to make a rainbow?  You will need a box of Froot Loops cereal,  a pipe cleaner, and two miniature white powdered doughnuts.  

Separate the 6 different colors of Froot Loops into 6 different bowls. (I got my bowls at Walmart.)  Next, bend the end of a pipe cleaner down 3/4" so that when you put on your first Froot Loop, the cereal doesn't fall off.  

I line up the bowls in the order that you want the colors to go on your rainbow:  Red, orange, yellow, green blue, purple.  

Start with the red colored Froot Loop and put two on your pipe cleaner.  Go down the line of colored cereal and put on two of each color on, repeating the process 2 or 3 times.  (depending on how big you want your rainbow)

Bend the other end of the pipe cleaner and stick the 2 ends into the 2 doughnuts. 

Thanks Clara!  Job well done  Now all we need is a pot of gold.  

Thanks Dallin and Grandma Sherry for teaching us how make rainbows!

He Is Risen!

I remember singing this song as a child.  

It's nice to see pictures to the words and think of the meaning of this hymn.    

You can also see the video by clicking here

"Reflection concerning the division and turmoil that has arisen"

This morning I listened to a BYU Hawaii Devotional talk titled "In the Days of Service" given by Elder Robert C. Gay.  As I started listening, these words immediately caught my attention:

As I begin today, I would like to share a brief, personal reflection concerning the division and turmoil that has arisen out of the recent pandemic and election in the United States. I, like probably many of you, have spent real time reflecting over all that has transpired. In this process I have felt both sadness and distress, but also resolve and peace. During this period, I have often turned to the scriptures for increased light and understanding. There I have been touched by one particular account. It is the occasion where the Savior with His disciples one evening began to sail across the Sea of Galilee. You may recall as they journeyed across the water a fierce storm arose. Waves crashed over their boat causing their ship to fill with water. Despite this chaos Jesus slept. He was calm. Soon, though, His disciples awakened Him and frantically asked, “Master, carest thou not that we perish?” (Mark 4:38). We next read this soul defining response and query from our Savior, “And he arose and rebuked the wind, and said unto the sea, Peace be still. And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm. And he said unto them, Why are ye so fearful? How is it that ye have no faith?” (Mark 4:39-40).

What are we to learn from this? In part, for me I have been impressed that I must understand and know as never before that no matter what is going on in our lives, the overarching reality is that God is not absent but in the details, and can rebuke any storm. Please know and keep this truth dear, that our Savior knows, understands, sees and is in control of all things. He has all power to intervene and lift us from anything going on in our lives.

As I pondered Elder Gays beginning statement on the division and turmoil that we are seeing today, I feel he gave the solution in these words of his talk:  

Our Savior once taught, “He that is greatest among you shall be your servant” (Matthew 23:11).

Many years ago...my father taught me this very principle. At a gathering as someone asked him how they could make a difference in life, I heard him share a statement that he kept framed on his office wall. The words come from a French professor (that lived during the early 1800's) by the name of Chateaubriand. He was a brilliant historian and writer. One day a group of students came to him with a challenge. They asked him to summarize the history of the world in a single sentence. After pondering the question for a few moments, Chateaubriand said this:

“In the days of service all things are founded, in the days of special privilege they deteriorate, and in the days of vanity they are destroyed.”

He is greatest, as the Savior said, who serves. This too is what my father wanted me to understand as much as anything else. But what does this really mean? It means that all we do must be about service. For relationships to thrive, for societies to flourish, and for mankind to fulfill his potential, we must choose to serve. This includes every corner of our lives, including that which is done in person and online. In contrast...if we choose the course of the natural man, which is so easy to do, all things are destroyed (see Mosiah 3:19). Your challenge today at BYU is not only in earning a degree but in coming to know how to utilize the skills and knowledge given to you here in service to God and mankind.

Thank you, Elder Gay, for your words of wisdom.  You can listen to or read the whole talk by clicking here.  

Podcast: The Story of How the Coronavirus Vaccine Came To Be

My daughter shared with me this podcast from This American Life.  In the program, David Kenstenbaum spoke with four scientists who worked on the coronavirus vaccine.  

What I loved about listening to this podcast was that David interviewed and talked to the scientists, themselves. He didn't interview politicians, or news stations, or journalists, or talk radio personalities.  He talked to THE scientists who developed the vaccine.  

I learned a lot as I listened to the podcast, and you can too. I came to the conclusion that these scientists were working under divine guidance. When I was done listening, it gave me confidence and direction on how I will move forward when the vaccine becomes available to me. 

Another daughter said this about the podcast as she shared it on her Facebook page:  

"Here is a podcast talking to the people who were behind creating the Covid-19 vaccine. Pretty interesting. I learned that the vaccine has been in the making for years! Wow! I feel God's hand was truly involved here...several years before this chaos even began. Can you imagine if scientists only started to develop this when the pandemic broke out?  We wouldn't see a vaccine for a long time."  

Copy and paste the below link into your browser to listen to the podcast:

https://www.thisamericanlife.org/727/boulder-v-hill/act-two-10

After you click onto the link  you will see this.  Click onto the play button to hear the podcast.     

It's that Time of Year to Wish You a Merry CHRISTmas!

We've been enjoying the nativities that we've been able to collect over the years and the memories that go with them.  We have other Christmas decorations, too, but the nativity celebrates the birth of Jesus Christ, the reason for celebrating Christmas. 

The three-tiered cardboard set in the middle is the original nativity scene that I received in 1966 from my Primary class.  I remember, as a 10 year-old, reading from the Bible the story of Jesus's birth to my family as I set it up. 

The carved mahogany nativity on the far right is from Belize.  We were happy to be able to get it just before we came home from our mission.  We got the Wise Men from a thrift store in California.  In Duarte, we hung it on our wall.  Here in South Jordan, Scott made a stand for it.  

We received this dip and drape Wise Men set as a wedding gift.  We were married in December of 1977.  Dip and drape was the rage back in the 70's .  I'm glad they have survived all these years, as their heads are made out of hollowed-out eggs.    

This is the first year we have displayed this nativity.  I found it at a Deseret Industries in the middle of the year and was happy to find the perfect place to display it in our kitchen.  

Kristine gave us the coconut shell manger scene when she was attending BYU-Hawaii.  Lisa gave us the red set that she picked up as she traveled through Guatemala on a study abroad.  

The nativity sketched in glass that sits beyond the music stand was obtained from a thrift store in Logan, Utah, several years ago and is displayed on our piano year round.  

Lisa brought back this set from Argentina, where she served her mission.  

My sister-in-law, Kerri, hand crafted and painted this for us.  We started out with a few pieces and each year, for several years, she would send a new figurine to add to our set.  

We got this the year we moved to South Jordan to set up in our new home. 

Scott's mother gave us this set when she moved.  

When we lived in Duarte, I found this beautiful rendition of the nativity at a Senior Center community yard sale.  It fits perfectly in our entryway to our home.    

2021

Rachel gave this to me for my birthday this year.   

She got it at the Swiss Days Festival in Midway, Utah

We were excited when we got this new Nativity set.  We thought we were pretty clever when we bought a star ornament and hung it from the ceiling with a fishing string.    

The star on the top of our Christmas tree was the original star we made for our first Christmas tree 40+ years ago.  We cut out a cardboard star and covered with tin foil.  All  of our ornaments are ones with memories that we've gathered throughout the years.  

2022  

We are happy this year to add this figurine of Joseph, Mary, and baby Jesus to display in our living room.  I was able to purchase it from the thrift store a few months ago.  

2023

I cut this picture out of the 2022 December Liahona Magazine and framed it.  

It is now hanging in our living room. 

The painting is called:  Heaven’s Gift, by Dan Wilson, courtesy of Havenlight.  

You can see the painting by clicking here.  

This caption is under the painting in the magazine.  “And she shall bring forth a son, and thou shalt call his name Jesus: for he shall save his people from their sins.” Matthew 1:21

I got this Joy sign... 

...and this, "O Come Let Us Adore Him" stand....

...from the after-Christmas clearance sales last year.  

Merry CHRISTmas!